Awkward Silence



 (1)  Nate: "Are you guys alright with this?  Does this make sense to you?"
        Me: "I wonder when was the last time Nate got a haircut?  There is a picture on his website of him shaving his hair but that has got to be from the 90's.....seriously, his hair is longer than mine..."



(2) "You know, Nate really does look like Liam Neeson when he was playing Qui-Gon Jinn....I wonder if Nate has force powers?  YOU UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF THE INTEGRAL...no, wait that's Darth Vader, and James Earl Jones never had that much hair.  And never taught math.  I bet this lecture would be more interesting if Nate had a light saber...yah...light saber.
      "Wait, what did he just ask?  I don't know...just smile and nod.  Maybe it'll look like I was kinda paying attention."



(3)   
The Hat
The first thing I notice when I engage my eyes and force them to function, is the guy in the hat; He's always with that hat.  It's like he doesn't want to expose his hair.  Or perhaps it's a wig?  I think he teaches math, even though there is more Greek than numbers on that Blackboard behind him. Hmm, that blackboard is really messy.  You can see centuries of writing etched on it.  He is saying something, trying to communicate.  I engage my ears now, but still don't understand anything.  I look at my watch.  Is it frozen?  The Guy in the Hat is panicking because everyone around me looks equally dead. I find him interesting, and decide to doodle him in my notebook.  I focus on him, concentrating. His panic turns to relief for some reason and he smiles at me.  An hour crawls by, I look at my watch again.  I must be trapped in a time tunnel! Not even a minute has passed! The guy next to me was staring at my doodle.  After a life-time, the Guy in the Hat says with obvious gratitude that the class is over.  We file out like Zombies.  See you next class, same time, same place, same guy, same Hat.



(4) We often think of our weekends during those moments of silence...such as this thought that oft runs through many of my classmates brains:
     "Was is beer before liquor never sicker?....or was it beer before liquor gets you drunk quicker?...maybe liquor before beer never fear?....nope, it's definitely liquor before beer, best times all year."



(5) My notebook is full, formulas oozing off each page. Partial fractions, secants, sigmas splattered everywhere.  I'm listening, sorta; I try.  But my teacher speaks in tongues.  He clicks and clucks, rants and raves, and all I hear is: ``Bumblebee tuna." What the hell is he talking about?

Don't get me wrong, he tries.  I just don't get it.  And neither of us know what to do about it.

But what's with questions like, "The Maclaurin series of sin(x) is?" Seriously, why should I know?  You really wonder what we're thinking during those awkward moments of silence? Here it is: Please keep talking so the clock will start ticking again.



(6) I wonder how long we can keep up the blank stares...Will it be long enough to get him to tell us a humiliating story about himself?  I sure hope so, I can only stay awake for so long with Taylor series as my only entertainment.